Random NBA Photo of the Day: Shaq lying on top of Joakim Noah.

"Shhh, just let it happen, Joakim" - Shaq, probably... not? Via: Reddit

Getting squished by a 7 foot, 350 pound (I know it says 325 in his playing days, but this is in his Cleveland years, dude moved like he got shot in the legs) monster will do this to a man. I feel for you, Joakim. I once had judo sparring practice in gym class with a 6 foot 2, slightly obese 250-something pound man, (keep in mind, I am only 5'8") that nearly crushed my rib cage. He also drenched me in his sweat. So, my traumatic experience wasn't too different from yours, bro.

MC SHAQ D freestyle raps on NBA TV's Open Court.

MC SHAQ D and DJ C-WEBB IN THE HOUSE. THIS NEEDS TO BE A THING NOW.

Shaq and rapper, Tyga stars in new Foot Locker Reebok commercial.

I don't really have a reason to want a "conversation lift," but I want one. Who would say no to a super stool.

Shaq's Lamborghini bet with then-Suns' coach, Alvin Gentry.

Only Shaq would break a huddle during practice and bet his coach a Lambo, which I highly doubt either could fit in to.

Shaq loses shooting contest to a 2 year old phenom.

AHAHAHA, DUDE DIDN'T EVEN MAKE ONE. What ever happened to making them when it counts?

Charles Barkley, Shaq, and other old NBA dudes go over what they bought with their first NBA paycheck.

Of course Bones kept his first paycheck. He's made enough for a living, from just doing weird dares with Tim Duncan.

Charles Barkley lays down the ultimate "Kazaam" smack on Shaq.

I going to miss these guys, why can't the finals be on TNT? CHUCK FOREVER.

Shaq falls off his chair in the attempt to reel in the "Charles" whale on Inside the NBA.

MAN OVERBOARD. I really hope this is a sign from the Basketball Gods, alluding to the future departure of Shaq from Inside the NBA. Can you (guys) take Reggie Miller with him too? Please and thank you.

LeBron James crashes into Shaq's lap.

I know LeBron James can reach up to the top speed of a moving freight train, but good thing the situation wasn't the other way around, because had Shaq crashed into the the stands, someone would have been pulverized. That is unless, they do this...

HAHAHA... Shaq's Suns' days were the BEST.

Shaq has his own line of sodas now.

I wonder which one is Kobe's favorite? Via: @SHAQ

There are a few things very wrong about this:

1. AriZona made an actual line of Shaq sodas.
2. Shaq's face is on it.
3. It's creepy.
4. There are real people that will drink it.
5. Shaq is for some reason, still very marketable, which means he will likely stay on "Inside the NBA" for a very long time. /Cries
6. Cream sodas are super gross. (Especially when warm.)
7. SERIOUSLY, WHY IS THIS A THING?

The Inside the NBA crew clowns Charles Barkley's time on the Reggie Miller show.

I guess the eyebrow obsession wasn't just something Chuck picked up recently. Man, those things were wicked.

Charles, Kenny and Shaq clowns Dwyane Wade's flower jacket.

That jacket is not okay, Dwyane. In what world did you pick that thing up and said it would look good on you or anyone for that matter. Can you please do everyone a solid and just hire a stylist with eyes capable of sight? The one you currently have probably hates you anyways. And what is wrong with a nice suit these days? You are a professional basketball player, dress like one.

Charles Barkley and Shaquille O'neal's Three Point Contest.

In fairness, Shaq was in his cellphone salesman short sleeve, which allows for a wider range of motion compared to what Charles had on. But way too disappoint again, Chuck. This is the second time this week, now thanks to you, Shaq is going to keep running mouth about the "I make them when it counts" theory that he made up to get people off his back about his free throw shooting struggles.

Charles Barkley does not know the correct pronunciation of "Wi-Fi."

"WEE FEE," AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. I CAN'T BREATHE. DON'T YOU EVER CHANGE, CHUCK.

Shaq fends off Charles Barkley's tackle attempt.

I am super disappointed in you, Chuck. Now we are never going to hear the end of it on TNT, thanks a lot.

Charles Barkley and Shaq's Bench Press Competition.

I swear these two despise each other. But who would really believe that Chuck would out-bench Shaq. Class TNT gag.

Charles Barkley's day at the spa.

Damn right, he's no role model. You really want children to look up to a guy that has no shame in his game?

The Lakers got Shaq's jersey all backwards.

Jayne Kamin-Oncea/USA TODAY Sports

It was was Shaq's big night yesterday, when the Lakers honored his retirement by hanging his jersey in the rafters among a few of the greatest players to ever don the purple and gold uniform. As you might have noticed in the photo above, Shaq is the first to have the new Lakers jersey retired, and it must have caused some confusion, because they got the jersey all backwards. The new Lakers jersey, the current one that they are wearing now has the signature V-neck in the front, and as you all know the team name and the player's number go in the front, while the back, contains the round collar, the player's last name and their number again. Now if look up again at the photo posted above, you will see that instead of the round collar, Shaq's jersey has the V-neck on the wrong side, making it stick out more than it already does compared to the other jerseys. The funny thing is, they got it right for the framed one, which is super weird.

Danny Moloshok/Reuters

This is bad you guys, not only for Shaq, but for future players as well. I mean, what are they going to do when they have to retire Kobe's jersey? Are they going to do it on backwards from now on ? Or fix it (Shaq's) before everyone catches on? Because there is absolutely no way a perfectionist, like Kobe would allow something like this to happen to him. No way.

Way to screw things up, billion dollar sports franchise.

Update: The Lakers obvious read my post and has publicly acknowledged the error. Point 1 for me.

The Round Up - April 2nd, 2013.

Nathaniel S. Butler/NBAE/Getty Images

Solo Melo: Against the LeBron James, Dwyane Wade and Mario Chalmers-less Miami Heat, the New York Knicks or should I say Carmelo Anthony, came up big, late in the second half to outscore the Heat by 20 in the 12 point win. Melo was literally on fire last night, he was engulfed in flames and everything, going off for a career high tying 50 points on 18 of 26 shooting (7 of 10 from three), and really nothing else (2 rebounds, 2 assists), but he had 0 turnovers, making him the only player in 5 years to score 50 without a single one of those silly mishaps. Also if you look at his shot chart, he did not score a single shot in the paint, which is super weird, or amazing.

Via: @nbastats

His teammates added the rest of the 52 of the total 102 points on the board for the Knicks' 9th straight victory, which is the current longest active streak in the league. Miami, on the other hand had quite a surprise of their own, getting a rare contribution from Mike Miller, who went for 18 points (7 of 12) and 8 rebounds after scoring only 2 in the last two months. It should be noted that all of Mike's points were from the first half, meaning that he remembered who he really was at half time and returned to his frail old self late in the game. Chris Bosh led the rest of the team with 23 points (6 of 13) and 6 boards in the end of Miami's 17 game home winning streak.

What year is it? 2008? This should not be happening.

No Shave Tuesdays: On Shaq's jersey retirement night, Kobe and the gang honored the original Superman with a 20 point win over the visiting Dallas Mavericks. In the place of the injured Steve Nash, Kobe played the facilitator role, (a role which Steve Nash never really got to play in this mess of the Lakers' team) and got a triple double out of it, finishing with 23 points (8 of 18), 11 rebounds and 11 assists. Dwight Howard chipped in for a game-high 24 points (7 of 12), and 12 boards. Earl Clark was huge off the bench, blocking a career high 5 shots to go with his 17 points and 12 rebounds. Trailing by 15 at the half, the Dallas Mavericks never looked like they were completely out of it, in fact they were primed to make a comeback in the fourth, but Dirk and Co. just ran out of gas. Dirk had only 11 points on 13 shots, 5 boards and 6 dimes. While Chris Kaman scored a team-high 14 points (7 of 10) in 20 minutes of play. The Mavericks are now 2 wins away from .500, maybe they won't get to shave, ever.

This also shouldn't be happening, because old. God bless those illegal German knees.

Bucket List: He might not be considered as one of the top 10 point guards in the league, but John Wall is sure making a statement for himself, as he goes off for 27 points on 8 of 17 shooting, 8 rebounds, 9 assists and a career high 3 blocks in the Wizard's 8th straight win at home. Their opponents, the Chicago Bulls did not have the greatest of shooting nights, hitting only 39 percent of the shots from the field and an even worse 22 percent from beyond the arc. And things don't get better from there, in addition to the poor shooting, Taj Gibson re-injured his sprained MCL injury that kept him out of 10 games in his 10 minutes of play and Kirk Hinrich would later get ejected on 2 technical fouls at a critical point in the game. Carlos Boozer led all Bulls with 19 points (9 of 18), 12 rebounds and 5 dimes in the losing effort.

Shaq and Jimmy Kimmel tries to fit as many peeps in their mouths as possible.

Pretty sure the peep counter was a little off, but should it really count if it is not actually in their mouths?Because you can just mash them together and get them to stick to the other marshmallows. Peeps are gross.