Monday, December 31, 2012

Tony Parker didn't think he deserved the NBA flop warning.

I can't. If this wasn't a flop like Tony Paker said, there is only two other possible explanations for his "dive." Either the ghost of Antoine Tyler from the movie, the Sixth Man (I think a Wayan was in it) pushed him or Toney Douglas has a tiny finger cannon that no one knows about. And since both are fictional, Tony should have probably kept his opinion to himself to avoid further embarrassment.

This is what he actually said (Via: Jeff McDonald):
How can he sleep at night, after lying to himself and everyone else. Toney Douglas was laughing because that was a terrible flop. A good one gets your teammates off their bench and cry. Even Manu couldn't help you there. But in Parker's defense, this is not exactly his area of expertise. After all, the French man is a more renowned flopper on the offensive end.

The Round Up - December 30th, 2012.

Stats Rundown:

Not the greatest line up of games on (Football) Sunday nights. Here are some things of note.

Last Big Standing: As the only real offensively skilled center left in the NBA, Al Jefferson proves to us why it worked before. He had 30 points (13 of 22 shooting), 8 rebounds, 2 assists, and 4 blocks to fall as another victim of the best team in the west.

Wade 2.0: After the criticism that Monta Ellis received for putting himself into the same category as Dwyane Wade, he shut everyone up. However, his 30 points (12 of 22), 4 rebounds and 9 assists performance would be for nothing in the 2 point loss to the Detroit Pistons. Poor Monta couldn't have it all.

Career First: DeMarcus Cousins got his first NBA triple double with 12 points (4 of 12), 10 rebounds and 10 assists. He must be auditioning for the Boston Celtics, because he never passes.

Little Man: At 5'9" Isiah Thomas can do a lot of things, especially to a struggling Boston Celtics team. He went for 27 points on 15 shots, 4 rebounds and 5 assists in place of the injured Aaron Brooks, who usually takes the starting position.

Long distance: Caron Butler was a perfect 6 for 6 from behind the arc to add to his total 29 points in another Clippers victory. This extends the winning steak to 17 and makes his team undefeated in the month of December (16-0). Which has only been done by 3 other teams in the entire 67 years of NBA Basketball.

Suggestive: I don't know what they are doing, I just know that Richard Jefferson is too old for whatever this is. (Via: @JazzSMangat)


Rejection x2: Thomas Robinson will not allow Jeff Green to have any points.

Lob City: We have seen this a million times. Please excuse me for making do with a highlight-less NBA night. At least DeAndre Jordan is having fun.

The Round Up - December 29h, 2012.

Stats Rundown

The league has been a guard's game for a while now, so it is nice that we can finally to pay tribute to the forgotten tall guys. Brook Lopez went for 35 points (13 of 20 shooting), and 11 rebounds in the Brooklyn Nets' second straight win under P.J. Carlesimo, which totally means nothing because the teams they beat were the Charlotte Bobcats and Cleveland Cavaliers. I just wanted to type his awesome last name.

Luis Scola is another big man, a very hairy one that ironically plays for the Phoenix Suns. He had 33 points on 26 shots, 10 rebounds, 2 assists and 2 blocks in the loss to more big men on the Minnesota Timberwolves.

Three taller players from the Timberwolves scored at least 20 points on Saturday. Nikola Pekovic led them all with 28 points and 11 rebounds. Kevin Love got 23 points and 18 rebounds. Andrei Kirilenko did a little bit of other things, 20 points, 5 rebounds and 4 assists. Pretty good night from the big guys. The Wolves still suck at handshakes though.

Rookie Watch: Michael Kidd-Gilchrist out did his former Kentucky teammate, Antony Davis in their NBA team match up. However, his 22 points (11 of 14), and 9 rebounds were not enough to get the Charlotte Bobcats the W over the New Orleans Hornets.

Return of the Sleepy Eyes: In his first game of season, Eric Gordon showed no signs of knee problems. He dropped 24 points, dished out 7 assists and stole 2 balls in just 25 minutes of play. Looks like his contract was worth it after all.

True Story: The tale of Avery Johnson's termination.
Via: @blanchard48moh
7 Years: Was the amount of time it took for Lou Williams of Atlanta Hawks to get his first career double double, 21 points and 12 assists. I guess we have to strip away his gunner badge now.

Goggles: Kevin Durant got new eye wear to compete with Russell Westbrook. (Via: @dailythunder)

Strategy Meeting: Goran Dragic is buttering up one of the NBA Officials. (Via: @1ambatman)

Whoops: Derrick Williams is always the reason why Ricky Rubio and Alexey Shved don't have 10 assists a game. I am pretty sure he leads the league in bricking dunks.


BANK: Don't believe what Shannon Brown said, I was there, he didn't call it. Okay, I lied, but my point is just as valid. (Via: @cjzero)

Andre^2: Non Athletic Andre lobs the ball to Athletic Andre because they can and they know the reverse won't happen.

The Circus is in town: Ring Master Toney Douglas pulls off his biggest trick right at the buzzer.

Sunday, December 30, 2012

Coach Greg Popovich is burdened by Stephen Jackson, because "all he does is Twitters."

Eric Gray/AP Photo
If you know anything about Stephen Jackson, it is his temper and reputation of being a head case that clashes with all the coaches he has ever had, with the exception of one. Out of every person (maybe Nellie in that miraculous 07' run) that had Jackson in his roster, only Greg Popovich managed to keep him under control and make him into an effective member off the bench. But as good as things goes, it doesn't always mean they don't get into each other faces.

From Dwain Price of Full Court Press:
San Antonio Spurs coach Gregg Popovich was doing an interview after this morning's shoot around at the American Airlines Center when he looked over and saw forward Stephen Jackson typing something on his cell phone.

"Jack's a pain in the (butt),'' Popovich said. "Look at him, all he does is twitters.

"He's twittering some stuff right now that'll probably get him fined, and then I've got to call the league and talk to the league and say, 'Yeah, I talked to him.' ''
I believe the correct term is "tweeting." I want to him get his terms right just in case he decides to get on this social media platform and make everyone's day with 140 characters or less. It would be the greatest account created. Imagine him responding to the Jackson's threat to Serge Ibaka, the comedic potential is endless. He can even use the millions of Coach Pop's reaction .GIFs to reply to everything, thus taking his media trolling to a whole new level.

Via: @cjzero

Read more here:

Read more here:
Jackson then chimed in and said: "It's not Twitter. It's Instagram.''
Just because the two cut ties on their once successful partnership, doesn't mean it is not basically the same thing. Besides (if you follow him on twitter) all he does with instagram is taking screenshots of a daily prayer he wrote/find and of course the occasional trask talking that have stopped as of late.

The Spurs are the most exciting on and off court team of the NBA. Please never change.

Read more here:

Read more here:

Monta Ellis believes he is as good as Dwyane Wade.

To be honest, Dwyane Wade is clearly better than you. He has more wins, 2 championships, All Star credentials, and is actually necessary for Miami's success. You on the other hand, is a cancer (see: Golden State Warriors' success after his trade). Your terrible shot selection and inability to make your teammates better (hindering the growth of a young team) was the reason you were moved.

If that is what you mean by being in the same category as Dwyane Wade, then Monta you really do have it all (wrong).

Buzy Sunday.

The regular scheduled posts today will be delayed due to some personal problems, things should be up around 2pm (PST). I know I owe you guys some write ups from a few games, those should be up all on Monday. They will include coverage for all of the recent game up till Christmas.

Thanks for reading.

Saturday, December 29, 2012

J.R. Smith talks about his 3,000 tattoos.

Okay, I might have exaggerated a little bit, but it is not actually hard to believe he has that many.

All Photos by Tom Heisler/The New York Times
J.R. Smith has by far the most tattoos on his upper body than any other NBA player and actually doesn't regret any of them. Here is a little story about the history of his ink.

From NYT:
Q. How many did you have before you think you lost count (of your tattoos)?
A. It was around 70-something. 

Q. How many tattoo parlors do you think you have been in?
A. Probably a thousand. I’ve been to so many where I didn’t get a tattoo. Sometimes I watch or go in to see what’s new. It really depends on how I feel. 
Being in the NBA, he probably have been to a tattoo parlor in every single city in America (well, that has a NBA team). Making it a pretty cool future Grandpa story.
Q. Which tattoo took the longest and how long was that?
A. My back. It took a day to do the outlining. I didn’t finish it until a few years later.

Q. Were you excited when it was done?
A. I wasn’t really excited. I was actually kind of mad because I wanted to do so much more stuff to it, but I had no more space.
 That sucks, after spending years to complete a tattoo, he wasn't excited because he had no space left to do anything else. Really?  Your back already looks like a street mural.
Q. Is there one tattoo that you wish you could remove?
A. I love all of my tattoos. 

Q. Were you always fascinated with tattoos? When did it start?
A. I actually hated tattoos. I told myself I would never get like this.
Q. When did it all change?
A. Once I got one, I was addicted.
Admitting is the first step, man. You will regret it once you get older and your tattoo stretches out because of the beer belly you develop after retirement.

All Photos by Tom Heisler/The New York Times
At this point is basically just one giant tattoo right? I wonder what is the percentage of his skin that is not inked, can someone figure it out for me?

Kobe Bryant would force Shaq to present his NBA Jersey retirement.

Despite the 3 Championships (one questionable), we all know Kobe Bryant and Shaquille O'neal were not the best of friends during their time as Lakers and that is why this was hilarious.

Even though, Shaq has repeatedly called Kobe, his "boy," I highly doubt their relationship is on good terms. But knowing Shaq, he will probably do it just for attention. If he does refuse, there is always Smush Parker, because you know Kobe has a long list of "friends" to choose from.

Jarrett Jack threw Dorell Wright's shoe into the 10th row during a NBA game.

The Golden State Warrior have been one of the biggest surprises of the 2012-13 season. Nobody expected them to be anywhere near where they are at right now. At least not with this roster. But they are currently 5th in the West and much of their success has come from an improved defense. Mark Jackson has instilled new defensive principles into this team and you can see Jarrett Jack using one of them here:

Who knew Jarrett Jack would close 2012 with arguably one of the greatest moment in the NBA history. This is what you would call a perfect play. First, Jack breaks the distance record of shoe thrown in an NBA game by an NBA player, and then knocks down a three on the other end to complete it. He even added an evil smug at the end to put the cherry on top. I bet that was not the way former Warrior, Dorell Wright thought he would be welcomed back in his old arena.

If you are wondering, there are other players that have thrown their opponent's shoes out of their reach and coincidentally the victims were all embarrassed in their former home.

Metta World Peace was of course involved in one these incidents. As a matter of fact, he might be the innovator of this movement. Trevor Ariza should be proud to be the first.

Dwyane Wade, who is slowly gaining a rep of being a dirty player after sending his leg directly into Ramon Sessions's reproductive organ, was part of the sneaker throwing history too.

The NBA is the best.

The Round Up - December 28th, 2012.

Stats Rundown

Ciao, my people of Italy or Denver Nuggets fans or Fantasy owners. You would be glad to hear that Danilo Gallinari has ended his cold shooting streak recently and just got a career high 39 points (14 of 23 shooting), 8 rebounds and 3 assists in the 34 minutes he played against the Dallas Mavericks.

Honorable Mention: To Tony Parker's 31 points (11 of 19), 5 rebounds, 10 assists and 2 steals against one of their Texas rivals, the Houston Rockets.

The Chosen One: Is there still any doubt that LeBron James is the best NBA player in world? This man had 35 points (15 of 22, 68 FG%), 6 rebounds, 5 assists, 6 steals and a block in a disappointing loss to the Detroit Pistons. With this line, he joins Michael Jordan, Scottie Pippen and Charles Barkley to ever post those numbers in the past 25 years. Impressed yet? How about taking a look at his shot chart.

Via: @ESPNStatsInfo

Boards: Kenneth "The Manimal" Faried grabbed 19 rebounds (7 Offensive) and scored 11 points in the blowout win over the Dallas Mavericks.

Rookie Watch: Anthony "Fear The Brow" Davis shows us why he was picked first overall, 25 points (11 of 20), 9 rebounds and 3 blocks against the Toronto Raptors.

Time Machine User: Kobe Bryant was short 3 points to save his 10 game streak of 30 points+, but he got his points in an efficient manner, he shot 9 for 18 from the field and had 5 rebounds, 4 assists and 2 steals in the victory over the Portland Trail Blazers.

Block Party V.I.P.: Tim Duncan's 2 blocks in the win over the Houston Rockets, gets him the 8th spot on the NBA all-time block list with 2, 543. The old man also had 30 points (13 of 20), and 5 rebounds.

Wig-Out: Cleveland Cavaliers fans all donned a Anderson Varejao's Sideshow Bob wig, because apparently his hair has it's own day.

Missed Opportunity: Greivis Vasquez missed out on his first triple career by a single rebound. He finished with 20 points, 9 rebounds and 14 assists. Just so you know he had 9 rebounds in the third and did not get a single one even though they went into overtime against the Toronto Raptors, who surprisingly pulled out a victory in a close game.

Turning Tides: It was a werid day in the NBA, the Washington Wizards beat the Orlando Magic to snap the 8 game losing streak. The Detroit Pistons tooks down the reigning NBA Champions, Miami Heat. The Sacramento Kings defeated the New York Knicks with a game winning three and did I mention that the Raptors won a close game?

Don't Call it a Come Back: The Los Angeles Clippers came back from a 19 point deficit against the Utah Jazz in the second half to extend their winning streak to 16.


Soarin': Thaddeus Young receives the greatest assist handed out by the great Kwame Brown. #NeverForget.

Embarrassed: Chris Copeland, a 6 foot 9 rookie gets his lay up attempt pinned against the back board by a 6 foot Aaron Brooks. Maybe dunk it next time?

Game Winner: This was James Johnson's first made three of the season, and it could not have come in a better time. Somewhere, Brad Miller is proud to have his number on JJ's chest.

Friday, December 28, 2012

Angry DeMarcus Cousins "talks" about his recent suspension from the Sacramento Kings.

DeMarcus Cousins of the Sacramento Kings haven't played a basketball game in a week, he was suspended for one game by the team on December 21st after a verbal altercation with the King's head coach, Keith Smart at halftime. But even though the suspension was lifted on Christmas Eve, Cousins did not travel with the team to Portland to play the Blazers and there are no reports that confirm that he would be playing against the New York Knicks tonight.

Great interview bro, you totally answered those questions. Just a thought, maybe top being a dick and respond to reporters in a professional manner.  This is why people think you are immature, you have hold your composure. There is only one person in the league allowed to that type of crap to reporters and his name is Greg Popovich. Is this a sign? They do need someone after Tim Duncan.

Kenny, Charles, Ernie and Shaq makes their 2013 New Year's Resolution on "Inside the NBA."

I can't even tell if Shaq is trying to make jokes or find every single opportunity to show off anymore.

Bonus: Probably the best Shaqtin' a Fool of 2012. I still hate Shaq in the studio, but this segments is almost good enough to keep him on air.

The Round Up - December 27th, 2012.

Stats Rundown

Kevin Durant is a certified Mavericks killer. 40 points (13 of 28 shooting), 8 rebounds, 5 assists, 1 steal and 3 blocks in the overtime victory. The dude must love seeing a sad Mark Cuban.

Honorable Mention: To Darren Collison's 32 points (13 of 22), 5 rebounds, 4 assists, 4 steals and 4 for 4 from the three, one of which were the game tying shot.

3 point Alley-Oop: So that is why they signed Derek Fisher, Darren Collison got the chance to learn how to make last second shots from the best.

Boards: Serge Ibaka grabbed 17 rebounds (8 Offensive) and scored 19 points (7 of 10) to aid in Kevin Durant's world conquest.

The Band of Struggle Faces: This is what happens when you lose by 29 points and only score 10 points in the 4th quarter.

All Screen Caps are provided by @jose3030
Zidane'd: Chris Paul doesn't like people touching his head, but he is not shy to use it to hurt other people. (Via: @cjzero)

Punished: Dwyane Wade got a one game suspension for the destruction of Ramon Sessions's child creating tool and Dwight Howard got a $35,000 fine for trying to block the entire body of Kenneth Faried.

Sager Suit: Rick "Jim Carrey" Carlise doesn't even want to look at Craig. (Via: @cjzero)

Whoops: Ronny Turiaf gave his free throw a little bit too much of arc. (Via: @cjzero)


Posterized: Dominique Jones dropped "Thabeet" on Hasheem.

Hut: Russell Westbrook must be playing Madden in his off time.

Durantula: KD was everywhere in this game, and embarrassed Chris Kaman repeatedly.


No Swag: Days after his fur collared jacket, Kobe gets caught wearing his shorts over his pants. He is a walking Nike ad. (Via: @nikebasketball)

Thursday, December 27, 2012

NBA Boxing Day involved some hard fouls.

A few players from the NBA took Boxing Day to a literal level, using various types of boxing during games from last night. To make it right for the victims, let's play a game of "Dirty or Not." The rules are simple, watch the video and determine whether it was "Dirty or Not."

First up from the docket, we have a sad Dwight Howard taking out his frustration on Kenneth Faried.

This was definitely intentional and unnecessary. Dwight is lucky he won't get a suspension because Faried's dreads softened the blow to his head. His Laker teammate, Jordan Hill however, took a full Dwight kick to his face and his hair ccould not help him in any way.

Verdict: Not. Just a hard foul that went the wrong way.

J.R. Smith picked up his own flagrant foul after a sneaky shoulder to the airborne Goran Dragic.

Dragic did not return to the game, thanks to the contusions he received to his wrist, hip and back.

Verdict: Dirty, he purposely ran into Dragic and kept his arms to his side to look like it was unintentional.

I saved the best (in this case, worst) for last, we have Dwyane Wade splitting Ramon Sessions's groin in half.

Ramon Session was a little too chill about this, making me believe the kick wasn't as powerful as shown on the video.

Verdict: Dirty, even though it didn't cause much damage to Ramon's future child-creating endeavors, a man should never lift their leg up to another man's party area.

The Round Up - December 26th, 2012.

Stats Rundown

From the Phoenix Suns, Jared Dudley dropped a career high 36 points against the New York Knicks. However, his 5 rebounds, 3 assists and scoring was not enough to get the win. Here's a little foreshadow to why:

Via: thenbaguru
Honorable Mention: To Dorell Wright of the Philadelphia 76ers, who took over for the injured Jason Richardson and dominated. He scored 28 points on 8 of 11 shooting, and grabbed 6 rebounds to go with the win over the Memphis Grzzlies.

Glove: Monta Ellis was productive for a change. 20 points (3 for 3 from three), 6 rebounds, 7 assists and 6 steals against the struggling Brooklyn Nets. If you are wondering how he got 7 assists, well this is an example of a "Monta" assist:

Duos: LeBron James and Dwyane Wade combined for a approximately 75 percent of the Heat's offense. LeBron had 27 points, 12 rebounds, 8 assists, 4 steals and 2 blocks, while his sidekick got 29 points, 9 rebounds, and 5 assists in the victory over the Charlotte Bobcats. Who, by the way are on a 16 game losing streak. I guess they can only win 7 games per season.

Robin Lopez and Greivis Vasquez combined for 60 percent of the Hornets' points. Coincidentally they also had 56 in total. It is even weirder that one of them scored 29, while the other got 27 in their own victory. Totally not planned. This win over the Orlando Magic snaps their 11 game losing streak.

Rookie Watch: Just give Damian Lillard the ROY already, the award itself doesn't really mean anything but this man is putting on a show. 17 points (7 of 14), 8 rebounds and 11 assists against the DeMarcus Cousins-less Kings team.

Time Machine User: Kobe Bryant went for 40 points (13 of 24), 4 rebounds, 6 assists and 2 blocks to continue his 10th consecutive 30+ point game. This loss to the Denver Nuggets snaps their 5 game winning streak. You knew it was too good to be true.

Treys: Corey Brewer came off the Denver Nuggets bench to score 27 points in Kobe's face. He shot 6 of 7 from three in the 24 minutes of play.

Troubled Reptiles: Not a single Toronto Raptor starter more than 8 points in the 20 point loss to the San Antonio Spurs.

One Man Comeback: The Detroit Pistons were down 22 points entering the 4th quarter, in what seemed to be another blow out. But then Will Bynum happened. He scored 20 of his total 31 points in the 4th quarter to force overtime, where his team would eventually fall to the Atlanta Hawks. Good Job, Good Effort.

Trick-Tricks: Stephen Curry watched some Jamal Crawford tape.

Posterized: How can you be Mo Harkless?

Clutch: J.R. Smith poops on Jared Dudley's party by himself.

Wednesday, December 26, 2012

Blake Griffin pulls a prank on the cameraman.

Totally smooth, and unnecessary. I am sure you are not running any secret plays because one, Denver got blown out and two, your coach is Vinny Del Negro. Or there is a 3, which is probably the real reason. Blake is just bored, so he caused some mischief.

Dirk Nowitzki visits the hospital to play basketball with a new fan.

Dirk Nowitzki recently visited the Dallas Medical Center to meet kids one on one, and Will Kolassa from Chicago was one of the lucky patients. This was an incredible gesture, even though Dirk failed to make Will switch allegiances, he has done a great thing by just showing up and playing some hoops with the kid.

The Clippers and their ugly Christmas sweaters.

Via: Beyond the Buzzer
The Los Angeles Clippers got a bunch of Bill Cosby Christmas sweaters and decided to wear them to the game as a joke. Great one, guys. Matt Barnes clearly out dressed all of his teammates, he made due with a normal sweater by just sticking random Christmas theme objects on him. The others did alright, everyone deserves some love for not taking themselves too seriously during the holiday season. The Clippers are pretty cool now.

Via: cp3
CP3 Kid is so embarrassed, he is awkward for his dad.

NBA Christmas Day Bloopers in .GIFs.

AP Photo/Jason Redmond
NBA Christmas Basketball was everything, we hoped for. We got action, fights, highlights and best of all, bloopers. As great as yesterday was, it didn't start off too well. Let me just show you. (This will a take a little longer to load. Patience, young ones.)

Via: SB Nation
This basically summed up how the morning went.

Via: SB Nation

Via: SB Nation
Metta might have slipped on an invisible rock or selling enough contact to get a call from the league next week.

Via: SB Nation
WTF, Metta - LeBron James.

Via: SB Nation
Kevin Martin overestimated his athletic ability, taking off from beyond the free throw line for a finger roll in transition with defenders around you might not be the best idea.

Via: SB Nation
Kobe can't believe how bad Kevin Martin blew that lay up.

Via: SB Nation
Kevin Martin, why can't you make your lay up?

And of course, I saved the best for last.

Matt Barnes is a bad influence.

NBA Christmas Basketball Round Up.

Stats Rundown

In the 2012 NBA Finals rematch, LeBron James took out his rival with a near triple double. 29 points (12 of 20 shooting), 8 rebounds, 9 assists and 2 steals to flaunt in Kevin Durant's defeated face.

Honorable Mention: To James Harden's ridiculous efficiency. 7 of 13 from the field for a total 34 points (13 FTA), 5 rebounds, 6 assists, 2 steals and the destruction of the Bulls.

Boards: Omer Asik didn't hold back against his former Chicago teammates. He went for 18 rebounds and 20 points (9 of 13) to show how much of an idiot Gar Forman was.

Rookie Watch: Jared Sullinger was huge off the bench for the Boston Celtics, scoring 17 points (6 of 7) and grabbing 7 rebounds in the win over the Brooklyn Nets.

Time Machine User: Kobe Bryant won't stop shooting, so it is only normal for him to get another 34 points on 24 shots. The Lakers are now on a 5 game winning streak and just cracked the .500 mark.

Tiny Garbage Man: Nate Robinson remains as the greatest garbage time player, he scored all of his 27 points in the second half to bring the Chicago Bulls back from a 30 point deficit to only 18. The 120 points that the Houston Rockets scored on them was the most points allowed in the Tom Thibodeau era. Which means none of the Bulls had a great Christmas.

Swag: Kobe knows how to rock fur with his jacket and turtle neck. The fur is presumably removed from an animal that the Black Mamba killed with his death stare. (Via: @jeskeets)

Scuffles: Gerald Wallace tried to wedgie Kevin Garnett, while Russell Westbrook misses his daily dose of chill pills.

Pacqiao'd: Metta World Peace gives Steve Novak one of his notorious elbows. Where is Chris Tucker when you need him? (Via: @Beast17sa)

Controversy: Foul? Kind of hard to tell, so I am sticking with the ref's decision.


Trade Rumor: This is why you don't trade Pau Gasol, he is too smart not to find a way to be effective.

Shook: Jamal Crawford's go to move never ceases to amaze people.

Blast-Off: Blake Griffin defies every single law of physics.

Duel: LeBron James vs. Kevin Durant is the best basketball.

Tuesday, December 25, 2012

Kevin Durant's "Pajamas" Commercial.

NBA Christmas basketball hasn't got off to a good start with the Boston Celtics and Brooklyn Nets blow out, but the commercials have been great. Especially ones that involve Kevin Durant. Those are always gold.

Chris Paul has an identical twin brother.

It's always the mustache.

Merry Christmas.

My NBA friends and I would like to say a few things.

Something tells me that those reindeers are not too reliable for the demanding task of gift delivery that Santa Claus has to do. Don't be too surprised, if you don't see your presents under the tree today.

Via: WhoSay
Yea, Chris (There is no need for the last name because we are bros and on a first name basis) is a little weird.

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays everyone, thanks for reading. The blog activity will be a bit slower today due to the amount of Turkey that is stuffed into my face. Enjoy the great Christmas Basketball!

Monday, December 24, 2012

NBA Christmas Carols - Indiana Pacers Fans Edition.

Roy Hibbert might average 3 blocks a game, but he is playing the worst basketball since his rookie season. After getting the max 58 million dollar contract, so far in this season, he hasn't even been able to consistently score more than 9 points a game and grab more than 8 rebounds. Obviously it is still early and he has time to prove he was worth the money. Hopefully he can turn it around and not disappoint his awesome fans.

I am very disappointed about the lack of NBA Christmas carols, thought that there would a more of an effort from teams to wish us "Happy Holidays" via the language of music. Anyways, Merry Christmas Eve, everyone!

Jared Jeffries sings the Greatest Hits.

This compilation of songs sang by a defensively minded forward with no offensive skill set had the potential to be a great album. That was until he butchered the 'N Sync song. Completely unacceptable and an absolute deal breaker. He had the high pitch voice to sing it too, but just couldn't nail the moves and emotion in the song. People just don't know how understand how good 'N Sync was until they try to cover their songs. They are the best pop boy band to be ever assembled and their existence was a blessing. (Sike, I am just pulling your leg, or not.)

Samuel Dalembert takes the Cookie Challenge.

There is only two rules in this challenge, you have to get the cookie placed on your forehead into your mouth without using your hands. And look stupid while doing it.

Samuel Dalembert is not one of the better centers in the NBA, but at least he can say that he was better than Dwight Howard at one thing in the end of his career. Not sure if that he will get him Hall of Fame considerations though.

The Round Up - December 23rd, 2012.

Stats Rundown

The Los Angeles Clippers are the hottest team in the NBA right now. It is only fitting that Blake Griffin had 23 points (8 of 12 shooting), 11 rebounds, 3 assists, 4 steals and a block to tie the Oklahoma City Thunder's win total, making them second in the west. (The Clips are have one more loss than the Thunder)

Dishin': Another 13 assists for Chris Paul in the 13th straight Clippers win. He had 17 points and 5 steals against the Phoenix suns.

Boards: Nikola Pekovic, the human ogre grabbed 17 rebounds to go with his 21 points in the loss at the Madison Square Garden.

Don't Come it a Come Back: Carmelo Anthony scored 19 of the Knicks' 23 fourth quarter points for the comeback win over the Minnesota Timberwolves. Melo finished with 33 points (10 of 25) and 7 rebounds.

Phantom Punch: Carmelo Anthony whacks Andrei Kirilenko twice and then flops to get the call. Have you no shame? (Via: @cjzero)

Even Mike Woodson didn't like that. (Via: @cjzero)

It is not funny, don't abuse your star status to get out of fines.

German Fade away: Dirk Nowitzski returns to the NBA game for the first time after knee surgery. He went for 8 points on 3 of 4 shooting and grabbed 6 boards against the San Antonio Spurs.

Splash: The San Antonio Spurs sets a new franchise record for 20 three point makes in a game. 7 of those were courtesy of Danny Green who only missed one shot in the victory over the Dallas Mavericks.

The Original 3: Manu Ginobili's unnecessary no look passes are the best.

Denied: Shannon Brown didn't want to embarrass Blake Griffin by going to his full 50 inch vertical.

Put Back: Dante Cunningham cleans up Ricky Rubio's mess.

Late Rotation: No stare downs or any taunting from J.R. Smith, I don't even know this guy anymore.

Sunday, December 23, 2012

Kendrick Perkins sells Thunder jewelry with his smile.

Spruce Derden/US Presswire
This is a normal Kendrick Perkins face.

Too. Much. Smiling. What. Is. Going. On.? I. Am. Scared.

LeBron James will never compete in the NBA Dunk Contest.

Jonathan Daniel/Getty Images
Guys, this is the worst LeBron James news since the "Decision."

From SI:
On Saturday night after the Heat’s 105-89 home victory over the Utah Jazz, James ended all speculation about him competing in the (Slam Dunk) contest. When asked, if he would ever compete, James said:
“No,’’ said James to Fox Sports Florida. “It’s over with. I’m getting too old… It’s a taxing season. A lot of stars play a lot of the bulk of the minutes. So they got to protect their body and understand that they got to do what’s best for them. There were times when I wanted to do it. But I came into All-Star Weekend a few times banged up and I didn’t want to risk further injury.”
LeBron is currently in his 10th season, he is 29 years old and did this last year.

What was even more amazing than that dunk was that he managed to dodge the contest for this long. He entered the league at 19, and dominated right way with pure athletic ability (and the right amount of playmaking). According to NBA history, these kind of guys can't escape the beloved event of the All Star weekend. Hey Mr. David Stern, maybe you can do this one last thing for the fans before your retirement, we promise to hate you a little less.

LeBron, please give us an answer. Because winning the Slam Dunk contest was every child's dream and I can't imagine you to think differently. I still practice on my Nerf hoop to this day awaiting for my invite (my 360-through-the-legs is legit). I just don't get it, look at what he could do back in Cleveland and tell me how he could possibly lose to Nate Robinson (his 3-peat is a joke).

The worst thing about all of this, was that he lied. He declared for the 2010 Dunk contest and toyed with our hearts.

Thanks for crushing the souls of millions, again.

Joakim Noah's Tornado Shot Got Stuck.

Joakim Noah doesn't have the greatest shooting form in the league, but it works well enough to make him a somewhat respectable mid range shooter. I am totally joking, teams don't care if he shoots, it is one of those shots you allow for the benefit of your defense. And on Saturday, the Atlanta Hawks' decision to sag off Noah was justified. (NSFW language)

This is why you do not shoot a basketball with side spin, I don't even know how you can possibly pull it off without freakishly large hands. Everyone else has a backspin on their shot for a reason.

The Round Up - December 22nd, 2012.

Stats Rundown

Via: @blakegriffin - This was from yesterday, too crazy to not post. New brand logo?
If James Hardens wants to score, all he has to do is put his beard out in front, make contact with his defender, (while making sure they get a mouthful of hair) and he will get free throws. At least that was it looked like in every game. He had another efficient night, going for 31 points on 13 shots, 8 assists, and 3 steals in the 30 minutes of Grizzly butt whooping.

You Got Mail: LeBron James ties Karl Malone for the third longest streak of 20+ points games to start the season at 24. His 30 points, 9 rebounds and 7 assists in the victory over the Utah Jazz extends his zero personal foul streak to 6.

Block Party: Robin Lopez's hair alone blocked 6 shots, the rest of body had 24 points (11 of 16) and 11 rebounds in the loss to the Indiana Pacers.

Rookie Watch: Future ROY, Damian Lillard got 25 points (7 of 13), 7 assists and the game clinching jumper against the struggling Phoenix Suns.

Time Machine User: World Class Chucker, Kobe Bryant scored 34 points on 41 shots (Made only 16), and somehow only got one free throw attempt. For fun, you can guess how many Kobe-WTF-ref faces made over the span of his 44 minutes of playing time. He also had 10 rebounds and 5 assists in the overtime victory against the Golden State Warriors.

Great Canadian: Steve Nash returns with a horrible haircut, but was soon forgiven after hitting the dagger to seal the win in overtime. He finished with 12 points (5 of 8 and perfect from the three) and 9 assists. Steve Nash makes basketball really fun and here's prove:

Bucked Up: No one on the Milwaukee Bucks had double digit points, except for Monta Ellis, who scored 37 points in the loss to the Cleveland Cavaliers.

Please Come In: The Denver Nuggets were invited to score 78 of their total 110 points in Charlotte Bobcats' paint. I was told after the game, that the Bobcats were gracious hosts and the Nuggets would love to visit again.

Grinch Clutch: The Houston Rockets mascot got Salmonella. Yes, their mascot is a giant teddy bear. (Via: @talkhoops)

Skates: Masked Kyrie Irving gets rid of his defender to make a pass to maskless Tyler Zeller.

Unibrow Alert: There was a unibrow sighting in New Orleans. He was caught dunking backwards.

Ball on Goggles: Kirk Hinrich may I ask you how many successful blocks you average a game to make you believe that this would be effective in stopping a dunk? Your 0.never sure doesn't think so.

Saturday, December 22, 2012

Coach Doug Collins bought Big Macs for Sixers Fans.

Last Night, the Phialdelphia 76ers defeated the Atlanta Hawks 99-80, which meant that the Sixers were short one point to give out free Big Mac vouchers to the fans in attendance. Normally you would guess that the team didn't manage to score in time, but this was not the case.

The Sixers did have a shot to please their fans, with 23 seconds left in the game clock, one more basket in a blow out shouldn't be too difficult. But Coach Doug Collins stepped in and told his team to hold the ball as a display of sportsmanship. Obviously, the fans at the Wells Fargo Center weren't too happy about it. They booed like true Philly fans and it made Doug felt so bad, he took out his own money to buy them all a Big Mac. Just so you know, there were about 18,000 people in attendance, each Big Mac costs $4.33, which totals to approximately $80,000 dollars. Maybe letting Evan Turner score wouldn't be such a bad idea.


Via: The 700 Level

Metta World Peace Received Therapy from Children.

You can just put earthworms into a container filled with dirt and dig them up. It will be weird, but at least no one will get elbows to their head.

NBA Christmas Carols - Brooklyn Nets Edition.

The Brooklyn Nets really like to stick with the hip-hop vibe that Jay Z sort of created for them. Which makes a lot of sense, because the Nets are basically using Jay Z to suddenly become cool. The black and white jerseys, herringbone court, arena music selection are all credited to the HOVA. His "influence" has spread so deep that they even remixed 12 days of Christmas, only to do another terrible cover.

The trio of Jerry Stackhouse, Kris Humphries and Brook Lopez do have the voices to be Bass singers though. Boyz II Men still needs a Michael McCary. Maybe Jay Z can hook one of them up. Jerry would be my choice out of the three. For starters, he is closer in age and is actually good. USA National Anthem good. 

As for the carol, it was creative enough to take third place in my NBA Christmas Carol Power Rankings. Here is the list in order: 1. Dallas Mavericks, 2. Houston Rockets, 3. Brooklyn Nets, 4. Minnesota Timberwolves, 5. Denver Nuggets, 6. Golden State Warriors, 7. Los Angeles Lakers.

Andrew Bynum braided his Fro' and it looks super weird.

Via: @spencerhawes00
I don't know about you guys but I live for these Andrew Bynum hair updates. It is the only reason to watch any Sixers because the team is not playing most beautiful basketball. They are winning games that they aren't suppose to and losing games that they are suppose to win. I really hope he keeps changing up his style, and if that means he will sit out for the season, I would be very okay with that. There are just so many different ways to wear his hair and, I can't wait to see them all.

More photos after the jump. I got every single view.

Via: @EyeOnBasketball and @SickNievers
Via: @spikeeskin (instagram) Even, his braids look messy.
He could go Latrell Sprewell, which would be he most unrelated heart warming tribute. Just remember to pay your taxes.

The Round Up - December 21st, 2012.

Stats Rundown

A night after getting his 5000th, assist, Chris Paul decides to score instead. 24 points on 7 of 13 shooting, 5 rebounds, 5 steals and who am I kidding, this is the point god. He had 13 assists and the W over the Sacramento Kings.

Honorable Mention: To David Lee's triple double. His 23 points, 11 rebounds and 11 assist makes him the new NBA leader in 20+ points/10+ rebounds game. He is one ahead of LeBron James (10).

Boards: Larry Sanders is having an incredible breakout season, he grabbed 20 rebounds to go with his 17 points (8 of 10), 3 assists, 2 steals and a block against the Boston Celtics.

Rookie Watch: Andre Drummond gets his first ever mention, 11 points (5 of 7), 14 rebounds, 2 assists and 5 blocks in victory over the powerless Wizards. Not only did Detroit beat Washington , they did it by a total of 32 points. #FreeJohnWall and Wizard fans.

Time Machine User: Paul Pierce and his old man game went for 35 points (13 of 23), 12 rebounds, 5 assists and 3 steals. Despite draining the three to bring the game to overtime, his team would eventually fall to the Milwaukee Bucks.

Excitement: Joakim Noah is really happy about his 10th 10+ points, 10+ rebounds, 5+ assists game.

Thrown: 4 players and a coach was ejected from the Chicago Bulls vs. New York Knicks game. Carmelo Anthony, J.R. Smith, Joakim Noah, Tyson Chandler and Mike Woodson all headed out the exits before the game was finished. Fun fact: Melo leads the league in technical fouls (8). Rasheed Wallace has been nothing but a good influence.

This game was horribly officiated. Even Spike Lee was speechless.
Treys on Treys x 4: Stephen Curry hits a career high 8 threes in the win over the Charlotte Bobcats.

Big Bear: Zach Randolph currently leads the NBA with 20 double doubles in the season. He will be looking for his 5th straight against the Houston Rockets tonight.

Passing White Chocolate: Mike Conley Jr. is now the Grizzlies' franchise all time record holder in assists, surpassing Jason Williams. Sad face.

New Record: The Los Angeles Clippers is on a 12 game winning streak, the longest in franchise history.


Twinsies: The short dude lobs the ball to the taller dude that has the same hair as him. Cute.

Gerald Green Everything: If the man can pull off a dunk like this, he can stare as long as he wants.

Mini-LeBron: Does actual LeBron things in a smaller size. Give him more minutes, Vinny! #FreeBledsoe

Take-Off: Blake Griffin is always trailing and will get his dunk. John Salmons must have not seen him play before.

Athletic Reptiles: Let me repeat myself again, Raptor shooting guards are very good at dunking, and this time it involved a windmill.