Yachting Gasol brothers is the most NBA off-season photo ever.

Via: Daily Mail

Everything about this photo is perfect. Splash news (which is totally a real thing), Marc Gasol's socks, Pau Gasol's butt crack, and their increase in body composition. There really isn't a better off-season photo, at least not yet.

Via: TBJ

The Los Angeles Lakers 2012-2013 Season Blooper Reel.

They would have included every moment of the Lakers' season, but that would be too long of a blooper reel. BURN.

Random NBA Photo of the Day: Kobe and Pau are sad.

Via: Tumblr

Yep, this photo pretty much sums up this Lakers season. But it won't be long before they pull off some ridiculous trade in 2014, because, you know, Lakers.

Dwight Howard's "300" improv motivational speech. (Photoshop)

The following quotes are an actual thing and are in no way fictional for comedic purposes. These were the exact words Dwight Howard had for his teammates before their win over the Houston Rockets.

Howard immediately broke into character as a warrior from the movie “300″ clenching both his muscles and his lower jaw. 

“Listen, they don’t think we can do it,” Howard said as he paced in front of a few cameraman. “It’s 300 of us against all the Persians! We have to come out tonight. We got to look death in the eyes and say we don’t care if we die! We go hard!” 

Howard then starting mentioning members of the Lakers, including himself. 

“Kobe is watching us at home,” Howard said. “Dr Buss is watching us up high! Let’s let it out tonight! Everything we got! Everything! Leave it on the floor! Pau, put your big boy pants on! Dwight, hit your free throws! Jodie, hit those threes boy! Now let’s get it! Now let’s bring it in! Hoorah!”

Via: Inside the Lakers

Tim Duncan yams it on Metta World Peace and Pau Gasol.

Yep, still got it. 

The Los Angeles Lakers need to eat Skittles before games to win.

Via: @cjzero

In the NBA, the formula for success is simple and the Lakers, as a franchise is a living prove of it. The Gold and Purple was always successful because they have mastered this formula. It's easy, they put great players together and let them go to work. On the surface, it would seem like things would fall into place on their own, but Championships are not won by just purchasing multiple All Star players. It obviously takes more than that, and what better example of this, than the 2012-2013 Lakers. This team, built over the summer, put four future hall of famers together, all playing for a common goal. Expectations were high, and the Championship was supposed to be a sure-win. But after three months, those odds are looking bleak. The Lakers have only 39 more games left in their schedule, sitting at a record of 18-25, playoffs might even be out of the question. Evidently, this team has more than just problems on the court, and according to Dwight Howard, the negativity among teammates, fans and media is one of the issues. Coincidentally, he knows how to fix them as well. 

From ESPN:

"I'm just talking about negativity in general," Howard said. "That's like a dark cloud, and the more you feed into the negativity, the bigger it gets. So, we have to change that and we have to believe. For all the fans and everybody who support the Lakers, believe. Yes, we're struggling. Yes, it's not the best time to be a Laker fan or a Laker player, but we will get out of it. There's a rainbow on the other end. We just got to make sure we get to it. I don't know if we got to eat some more Skittles or whatever it may be, but we got to find a way."

Yep, the problem with the Lakers was just that they weren't eating Skittles before basketball games and not totally because of their terrible defense. Okay.

The Los Angeles Lakers' defense summed up in 15 seconds.

Via: @cjzero

The 2012-2013 NBA season hasn't been too nice to the Lakers since the beginning. After acquiring two All Stars over the summer to join forces with another pair of All Stars, the Lakers were sure favorites to win the Championship. Fast forward 3 months later, they are 17-25, riddled with injuries, players are unhappy and no one knows what to do. It's simple just to say their issues are dependent on defense because they are ranked 20th in the league in defensive rating, allowing an average of 107 points a game to their opponents, but there are definitely problems that goes beyond their struggles on the court. Poor Steve Nash was left alone to fend for himself.

Even Kobe, who has been surprisingly optimistic so far this season, has finally broken. BROKEN.

Soak in it Laker fans, this is the face of a man drowned in sorrow. Once the Lakers fail to make the playoffs, which will happen because they have tough schedule ahead of them and will need to win the next 31 of their upcoming 40 games, just to secure a playoff spot. The majestic Kobe will crumble and the inner pathological monster in him will crawl out. Killing every single one of his teammates, and coaches before taking away his own life. Okay, that won't happen but there will be changes in the organization, hopefully it doesn't involve duffel bags.

Metta World Peace had a hilarious exchange with the media.

"... They don’t want the pressure. Not only do I want the pressure. I’m going to crush the pressure, bite the pressure and drink the pressure. Then piss it out.” - Metta World Peace, 2013.

The 2012-2013 Los Angeles Lakers season described in two videos.

The Los Angeles Lakers came into this season with a revamped roster that included 4 All Stars that set out to get another Championship banner for the franchise. But to everyone's surprise, the team has been a total failure. They are now sitting below .500 and if they keep playing at their current pace, they are going to be out of playoff contention.

It is not fun to be a Laker right now, the team has issues, and guys are just not getting along. (Except for Steve Nash and Metta World Peace, they seem friendly.)

The fans aren't taking it any better.

There is always next year. Who cares if they are older, defense is not important.

Please Trade For Pau Gasol - A Los Angeles Lakers PSA.

Please pick up your phone and call 1-800-Save-Gasol today, there is not a whole lot of time left for the Spanish big fella.

From: Ballerball

Los Angeles Lakers defense in the tune of Yakety Sax.

This was arguably the greatest Lakers defensive stop in the entire 2012-13 season. Actually there are no arguments, this was flat out the best defense they have played so far. Can someone teach Danilo Gallinari how to dribble?

Man, Yakety Sax should be played over every single Lakers defensive possession, works even better because they are so comically bad on this end of the floor. On second thought, I don't think teammates blaming each other for their blown assignment fits the mood of the song, so maybe a simple wa-wa-wa-waaa will do.

Video by @jose3030

The Round Up - January 6th, 2013.

Remember when Mike D'Antoni said the Lakers practiced defense for 30 minutes. It is coming back to bite him in the ass.

Stats Rundown

Kevin Durant A.K.A. Velvet Hoop A.K.A. Mr.Efficient got 22 points on 6 of 11 shooting, 7 rebounds and 7 assists in the victory over the Toronto Raptors.

Honorable Mention: To Alan Anderson's 27 points (10 of 14 shooting, 4 of 8 from three), 4 rebounds and 3 assists off the bench for the Toronto Raptors. You might want get familiar with this dude, because he can play.

Dishin': Tiny Ty Lawson dropped an easy 21 points on the Lakers' "defense," and handed out 10 assists while doing so.

Boards: Injured back or not, Dwight Howard scored 14 points (6 of 7), blocked 4 shots and tied his career high of 26 rebounds against the Denver Nuggets.

Time Machine User: Kobe Bryant is still solid at age 34, he had 29 points (11 of 26 shooting), 5 rebounds and 7 assists. He did everything he could (offensively) to win this game for the Lakers. With less than a minute to go, the Black Mamba knocked down a quick three to cut the Denver lead to 3. Then this happened:

After the Kobe slouch, he went back to the other side to hit a tough turn around three to make it to another one posession game, but unfortunately the foul game never went their way. Needless to say, he is not too happy.

Via: @Sixfever

You can't blame him though, because not only he set a franchise record with 17 straight games of 27+ points, he scored 18 of it in the fourth quarter. The rest of the Lakers only scored 4. 

Betrayal: Javale McGee will take every opportunity to dunk the ball, even if it means smashing it on his own teammates. Poor Andre Miller doesn't even know what was going on.

Highlights

Copyright Infringement: Someone call Jamal Crawford and tell him that we have a case. We are going to sue Andre Iguodala for using his patented behind the back move in transition.

Skates: It is kind of unfair that Kevin Durant can be 6'10" and so smooth (velvet) at the same time.

 
Athletic Reptiles: Told you the Raptors can dunk, why doesn't anybody listen. Then again, he dunked on Serge Ibaka, who bites on everything.

NBA Christmas Carols - Los Angeles Lakers Edition.

Of course Dwight Howard acts like a fool in this video. Of course Kobe Bryant didn't sing. And of course Steve Blake's forced smile completely crushed your holiday spirit. This is exactly what you would expect from the Lakers from the second you clicked this video and it is also exactly why it slides to the bottom of my NBA Christmas Carol Power Rankings.

If you are still keeping count, the Dallas Mavericks stays in the number 1 spot, followed by the Houston Rockets, Minnesota Timberwolves and finally the Los Angeles Lakers.

Things Kobe Bryant might have said to Andrew Bynum at the Sixers game.

Via: @JonesOnTheNBA

The following exclusive transcription of the original conversation is likely fictional or totally real.

Kobe Bryant: "I am only doing this because the camera is on us and not because I actually care for you."

Andrew Bynum: "Nice to see you too, Jerk face.

Kobe Bryant: "Since we have to look like we are having a legitimate conversation, how is your knee?"

Andrew Bynum: "I can't run yet."

Kobe Bryant: "So I was right about calling you being nothing after the Dwight Howard trade."

Andrew Bynum: "Look asshole, you traded no.1 for no.2. Dwight is not winning you any games and my team has a better record than yours even though I am probably never going to play for them."

Kobe Bryant: "More like no.1 worst injury for no.2 worst injury.

Andrew Bynum: "You are never short of those trademarked smart ass answers are you?"

Pau Gasol: "Chill out, guys"

Kobe Bryant: "Shut up, Pau. You don't have a place in this conversation."

Pau Gasol: *whimpers* "I hate you!"

Kobe Bryant: "Why did you say?" *Kobe Death Stares*

Andrew Bynum: "Man, screw this. The camera got enough footage. I am leaving."

Kobe Bryant: "One more thing, what the hell are you doing with that hair? You a trend setter now?"

Andrew Bynum: "YOLO" *Walks away*
______
Excerpts from real quotes from ESPN and Sulia.

The Globetrotters grants Kobe's request to play the Washington Generals.

Martinez/Getty

In perhaps the biggest surprise of the season, the Los Angeles Lakers are off to their worst start since 1978. After a summer block buster trade that landed Steve Nash and Dwight Howard, this team was expected to be instant Championship contenders. But they now stand at 9-13, they are on a 4 game losing streak into the first quarter of the season. The players are frustrated, and for the first time in his career, Kobe seems lost. He is so defeated that he even suggested playing the Washington Generals in an attempt to bring life back into his team.

“Every game for us has a lot of meaning to it at this point,” Bryant said after a 116-107 loss to the Knicks in Madison Square Garden. “Maybe if we were rolling, playing well … at this point, I wish we had the Washington Generals on our schedule.”

Kobe asks, Kobe gets:

For those who don't who the Washington Generals are, they are simply an exhibition basketball team full of losers that never managed to beat the Harlem Globetrotters more than once. There have not been reports of Kobe accepting the offer, but they do play the Washington Wizards today, which is a close second.

Good thing Kobe didn't challenge the Globetrotters, because they got his moves down and are ready to defend against it.

Via: Slam

Defending Pau Gasol and why the D'Antoni System will never work. (+ Notes from the Orlando Magic game)

Stephen Dunn/Getty Images

Orlando Magic 113 - Los Angeles Lakers 103



The Good

Magic: They exacted revenge on their former All Star teammate that put them through hell for the entire summer. The Magic is a well coached team that works hard to make up for their lack of talent. Jacque Vaughn knows how to use his arsenal of unlimited (streaky) mid range shooters that is at his disposal. His team executes and constantly moves with or without the ball.

On defense, they actually play with effort and can get a stop, unlike their opponent.

Lakers: There is not much to be said, except let's just wait for Steve Nash to come back.

The Bad

Magic: They beat a far superior team at home, the only thing that sucked was that they put us through a whole hour of Hack-A-Dwight. Thank God, for the fast forward button on League Pass.
 
Lakers: Enough with the Pau Gasol bashing, especially from the Laker fans. You guys are already the most spoiled basketball fan base in the NBA. How can you disrespect a guy that won you two consecutive championships, when he is just trying to find his way in a new system. It is still too early in the season to give up on Pau Gasol. He is way too good to trade away and there no determining his impact after Steve Nash's return.

Imagine yourself as Pau for a second. After you worked hard to bring two trophies to Los Angeles, a slight dip in numbers places you on the trading block. He has been mentioned in trade rumors so many times, you wonder how he managed to stay focused. I applaud him and his ability to cope with the situation. He played the past 2 seasons not knowing where he would end up and remained efficient, it is not impossible to believe he is dealing with trust issues.

Yes, I know he can sometimes be a defensive liability, and soft in the post, but I also know that he is only 32 years old, dealing with knee tendinitis and still incredibly talented. The Lakers have to show that they trust him. Which can start by getting him more involved. The offense must go through Pau and Kobe. Give the ball to Gasol in the post, make the stationary Lakers cut and he will get you a good shot or make a nice post move for an easy finish. Kobe has been a willing passer this season and is shooting out of his mind. Averaging career highs in both field percentage and three point shooting. He alone, can make his teammates better.

Dwight Howard came to the Lakers to do two things, defend and rebound. Stop trying to run the offense through him. He is not a good passer, his post moves are limited and his back is not healthy. I went through this game twice, and there was only one possession where he actually used his body to get himself close for the dunk. The rest of them, he bumped his defender to get the basketball and will spin into free space for a flat hook. Make your opponent eat your shoulders, and jump over them. As for the defense? Well, the Magic scored 31 points in the last 6 minutes of the 4th quarter, which pretty much summed up this end of the game.

With all that said I am going to contrast all the previous points I made, because the fact is that Mike D'Antoni's system will not work with this team. Despite the believe Steve Nash will make everything work. They don't have the youth to run, the floor stretching bigs or enough shooters (Pringles played Jodie Meek for 9 minutes, I guess going 7 for 8 from the three point lime against Denver doesn't earn any playing time. Jordan Hill didn't get to play too). Having two centers and one with a inconsistent jumper goes against everything his system stands for. There is absolutely no space for Nash to do his pick and roll. And the shooters lined up outside aren't particularly good either. Add on the defense he sacrifices, they might not even be able to get stops to for an early shot.

There is no doubt Pringles will get the boot and the Lakers will regret not giving into Phil Jackson's demands.

A Quick Round Up - November 2nd, 2012.

Stats Rundown 

This must be why Kendrick Lamar used to be jealous of Arron Affalo, 30 points (11 of 18 shooting), 5 rebounds and 5 assists against the Los Angeles Lakers.

Honorable Mentions: To Carmelo Anthony's 34 (11 of 27) points and 6 boards and Kobe Bryant's 34 (12 of 27), 7 rebounds and 5 assists.

Boards: Dwight Howard had 21 points and 15 boards in the loss to the Orlando Magic.

Spoiled Meeting: Despite the fantastic line Dwight Howard put up against the ex-girlfriend that he hasn't seen for months, he didn't do so well on the free throw line. The Orlando Magic abused the Hack-A-Dwight and rightfully so, as the indecisive big man only went for 9 of 21.

Last Quarter: The Orlando Magic scored 40 points in the 4th quarter, which is 14 more points than the Los Angeles Lakers.

Metta World Threes: Metta World Peace hits his 1000th three pointer today, and apparently he is the 68th p;ayer to do it, which is quite a surprise.

Slow Motion: You know you can't defend, if Metta World Peace can go by you without any effort. Someone needs to correct MWP's running form, dude runs like a flightless bird.

Points: Carmelo Anthony is now 86th in the NBA all time scoring list, leaving James Worthy behind him.

Double Flop: I don't know if I should be upset or be amazed by this thing of beauty. Sebastian Telfair is sneaky, flopping even after hitting Pablo Prigioni in the face.

Spanish Denial: Getting blocked by Glen "3 inch vertical" Davis pretty much sums up Pau Gasol's season so far.

The Round Up - November 27th, 2012.

Stats Rundown:

Not a great NBA schedule yesterday, 6 games, none were too pretty. The Beard stood above all, James Harden had 24 points, 6 rebounds, 12 assists, 3 steals and a block in the win over the Toronto Raptors.

Boards: Kevin Love only get buckets and boards. 23 points and 24 rebounds in the victory over the Sacramento Kings.

Shout out: To Anderson Varejao, 20 points and 18 rebounds in the loss to the Phoenix Suns. This game marked his sixth 15+ rebound streak.

Time Machine User: Kobe got the flu, and if you know anything, it is that the Mamba plays better impaired in some kind of way. He carried the entire Lakers offense with his 40 points (12 of 28 shooting), 10 rebounds, 3 assists, 3 steals and a ugly triple double notching 10 turnovers in the loss to the Indiana Pacers.

Everything Sacre: He's awesome at parties.

NBA Replacement Refs: A super weird double foul, and the ultimate cop out.

Real Refs don't mess around: Joey Crawford is the most entertaining official in the NBA, I mean who else high steps for a blocking foul. Cool Deion Sanders impression, Gramps.

Whoops: Omer Asik forgot his compass, and couldn't figure out which basket is at which cardinal direction.

Surprise: Nick Young doesn't always pass, but when he does, it is always Swaggy P approved.

Highlight of the Night: Terrence Ross likes to prove that the Toronto Raptors are never short of jumpers. From Vince Cater to Tracy McGrady to Jamario Moon (He is back to being a Globetrotter right?) to DeMar DeRozan, Canada is pretty great at picking athletic swing mans that never win.

Game Winner: I think George Hill is leading the league in game winners made in this season.

The Feed: San Antonio Spurs vs. Los Angeles Lakers [11/13/12]

Recap:

The San Antonio Spurs edged out the Los Angeles Lakers, 84 to 82 in a close battle at the Staples Center. Neither team led by more than 8 points, and stayed within one possession throughout most of the game. There were a total of 11 lead changes and 4 ties in this possible Western Conference Finals match up.

Tony Parker wreaked havoc for the Lakers, scoring 19 points to go with his 7 assists. Tim Duncan added 18 points, 9 rebounds, 4 assists and 4 blocks. The Spurs weren't having an easy time getting their buckets, only shooting 39 percent from the field tonight. The Lakers defense forced them into tough shots and Dwight Howard's presense in the middle did not make it any easier. The Spurs defense would not spare any mercy either, stealing the ball from Los Angeles 13 times to contribute to their opponent's 17 turnovers (Spurs only had 8).

Kobe Bryant led all scorers with 28 points and 8 rebounds. His offense was crucial late in the game. He single handedly brought the Lakers to the brink of victory, however his effort was reduced to waste by Coach Poppovich's brilliance. With less than 16 seconds to play, he drew up a play that led to a Danny Green game winning three pointer that left 9 seconds on the clock. The Lakers would return from their own timeout, without the same success. San Antonio's ball denial on Kobe, forced Pau Gasol to throw up a three point prayer that never found its way to the basket.

I am sure making Dwight Howard set a screen on his own teammate was not part of the plan, it was still executed to perfection.

Offensive End:

The Spurs have an advantage that most people would dismiss. Some people might have criticized the zero changes made to the roster in the summer, but it allowed this team to build a chemistry. You can see it in their play, they react according to tendencies and know where everyone's spots are.

Tony Parker carved up the Lakers, he killed them in transition, in pick and rolls (When Dwight is absent) and in dribble penetration that led to open outside shots for his teammates.

Kobe Bryant was just being his unstoppable self, there was really no way San Antonio could have contained him. Maybe putting Kawhi Leonard on him instead of Danny Green. Metta World Peace is a waste of Kawhi's talent.

Los Angeles has to realize that they have an advantage in size. They can not let the Spurs to outscore them in the paint, which did happen, 38 to 26. When you have the two of the best centers in the league, they need more than 10 shot attempts per game to be of any effect. Even MWP had 14 tonight, about 5 more than the big men.

Dwight Howard needs to learn how to make a quicker move, he takes way too long in the block and with his terrible free throw shooting, he needs to avoid all help defenses at all costs. Just watch some Shaq tapes, he hits his man once and just dunks it right on him, you can easily do the same.

Defensive End:

The Spurs played a good defensive game, besides for Gary Neal. This man was so horrible in rotating, he actually allowed Chris Duhon to score multiple times, let me repeat myself just so you are clear, it's CHRIS DUHON!

The Top heavy Lakers once again suffered from poor bench play, unlike San Antonio, who can make a complete rotation change, they have to make adjustments and leave a starter or two with the second unit. They did not get outscored today, they just played terrible defense. Especially, if Dwight Howard isn't the one anchoring the unit. Without Dwight, Tony Parker is a nightmare. The All Star center does not just reduce the French point guard's attacks, he can also stop the pick and roll game. If he gets beat, he can easily use his length and athleticism to recover, blocking the shot just by pinning the ball against the backboard.

Notes:

• Dwight Howard wearing a head band in addition to his two ridiculous arm sleeves is stupid.
• I am going to lock it in early and call Robert Sacre, the BEST bench perforner in the 2012-13 season. Nobody stands up for every single shot like Sacre, the Canadian enthusiasm hasn't left him yet.
• Kobe Bryant actually drew a charge in this game, not sure if it is the first one. Weird, because I remember him saying that he would never try to draw one, due to injuries that have occurred to his predecessors. You can't sneak one on me Mamba.

The problems the Lakers needs to address.

We all saw the game last night and it was ugly. If you didn't catch it, consider yourself lucky. The Lakers were just out hustled in every single way possible. You would think that a Mavericks team without the German Assassin Dirk and Huntsman Kaman, would get blowout by Kupchak's own version of the Avengers, but instead they put on an embarrassing debut.

The Lakers might have lost to the Maverick by a small 8 point margin, it was still in no way a close game. This game exposed all of Los Angeles's problems and surprising it took one shorthanded team to do it. If they want to get somewhere in June, they need to start addressing them now.

The Problems:

1. Dwight Howard's free throw shooting. Let's face it this will never get better, hopefully they don't meet the Spurs, other wise coach Popovich will be having the time of his life.
2. Having Steve Nash and not using his nashabilities. You can not have Steve Nash on your team without having him dominate the ball. Pick and Rolls need to happen and everyone on the team has to run.
3. This leads to another problem, if the Lakers decide to run and abandon the Princeton offense, how are they going to sustain their energy, with a aging and injury plagued roster, they can't really afford to run every possession. Going to the bench early is not an option, they will give up leads in a flash if they are relied on. The Mavs's bench outscored the Lakers 37 - 17.
4. Despite having so much height over the other team, they did not abuse it. The bigs need to put up at least 20 shot attempts every night. If they can't even put up big numbers against skinny Brandon Wright and undersized Elton Brand, what will they do against taller teams in the West.
5. The Back Court defense was just as horrible as I predicted, Collison and Beaubois torched Nash just by shooting jumpers, and if I am not mistaken most guards in this league on a playoff team can make a jump shot or two. Dwight and Gasol does their job just by being in the paint altering shots and lowers the confidence of players who dare to attack the basket.
6. This is not an actual problem, but Dwight Howard should never wear those sleeves again, those look absolutely ridiculous.

Until Mike Brown finds the answers, his future, along with the Lakers are facing imminent doom.